I Have a New Blog

The Hero always had time for some fun or if a child needed to visit about anything he was there.
These were some giant armenian cucumbers he grew in our garden. He thought they were much too fun to just eat, so he became a Water Buffalo.

I decided that this blog was a great memorial to my hero. I will not be adding much to it. I have started a new blog http://joyoustomorrows.blogspot.com/ This will help me think my way through my new horizons. Visit me if you would like. I hope this site will help some who are facing some of the challenges that my hero did.

Just know God is kind and merciful. Nothing happens by chance. We are all his children and he will care for us.

Gifts of Love

Today we laid my hero to rest. He was so sweet. I didn't know it, but he had left little gems of loving comments with special friends who shared them at his funeral today. It was a long hard day, but a joyous one that was uplifting to me and our family. We know the hero is in the arms of his Heavenly Father, and is rolling up his sleeves to work hard on the other side of the veil.
I hope that our posts have been a uplifting source to those who have come by to visit. The calls, letters, hand shakes, hugs, visits were, through out our ordeal, rays of sunshine that brightened our days.
May God bless you all as you have blessed us.
Thank you again,
the Hummer

Endings are the Doors to New Beginnings

My heart is heavy as I post this last post. The hero, after a long and valiant fight with colon cancer, passed on Tuesday the 23nd from this life to the next. Words I would use to describe his heart was kind, gentle, loving, uplifting, caring. He loved Heavenly Father, was thankful to Christ for the atonement. His was a very peaceful passing. Our oldest son and his wife were in attendance. While it was painful to know that the last breath was taken, the spirit told me it was for his benefit. He had gradually gotten weaker until he wasn't able to lift a spoon. He couldn't swallow. I had spent a day encouraging him to sip fluids to prevent him from having dehydration. I didn't want him to have severe cramping that goes with the dehydration. When he began to live in the world of angels more than this life, you could tell that it was harder and harder to come back to to this world to answer questions. My pain was that I could not hold him in my arms because every part of his body was extremely sensitive to touch.

God was good to us. We had 38 years of wonderful times and experiences together. Six children that have been awesome blessing to our lives. Then there was the 13 grandchildren that brightened the hero's days as he watched them grow, that brought smiles to his face even in the last two days of his life. His little granddaughter of 1 year would stand at his bedside and peer up to him looking for recoginition and both would smile at the other, if it happened.

I stand at the beginning of another phase of my life, as I accept the loss of my sweetheart. I do not dispair for I know that my Heavenly Father is mindful of my needs and will continue to hold me up as I step forth into my future.

Thank you for all your prayers and loving concern during the last year and a half, they were all greatly appreciated.

Have to Share My Funny

If I had a Santa HO HO HO, I would play it with this.

I have to share with you my funny. I say my funny. because it was a funny thing I did.

On Sunday, I wanted to wish my oldest granddaughter a "Happy Birthday". She was turning 15 an almost age, so I wanted to let her know I thought it was important.

Well...I started calling both of her parents phones at 1pm well after church to talk with her. No answer.

I emailed.

I yahoo IM'd, told my granddaughter I would have text messaged her if I had her phone number . I text messaged her mom's phone. No answers. Finally, in a moments desperation, I left a message on my son-in-law's phone saying, 'If you look out your window, you will see a little old lady with a picket sign walking up and down in front of your house. The sign says "Unfair treatment of a grandmother when she can't call her granddaughter." ' Still no response.

About 2 hours later, I received a call from...my granddaughter, my red head. I was so excited. I began telling her about my delima. She laughed and said "Grandma, my birthday is not until Wednesday." LOL. I had three more days before I was late. I told her that in that case, she needed to tell her dad to disregard the message I left. We both had a laugh about that. It was just wonderful getting to talk with her.

I am a blessed woman. I have wonderful, loving, caring, and kind children and grandchildren. That includes the wonderful ones who married my children.

Christmas Comes in a Car

This was our Monday Family Home Evening. Christmas in a car. Our youngest son went to a friends house for a Christmas party that we all usually go to. It was promising to be a quiet, possibly lonely evening. Our home and visiting teacher came by to drop off and pick up some things the hero needed. (They are wonderful people that serve with their whole hearts.) As they were preparing to leave a car drove up. We were baffled because no one had called and said they were coming. When you live at least 8 miles from civilization(although to those of you in the mountains that is not much, in the city minded folk that is a distance), most people call first to make sure you are going to be there or are able to take visitors. In seconds, the house was filled with Christmas. My sweet daughters had pooled together and had brought their families up. No easy feat, both live 2 hours away. The older boys made hot chocolate. Our girls had brought cinnamon rolls to go with it. The babies were busy giggling and seeking what they could get into. After a prayer, the family sang Christmas songs with the hero. He had the energy for a verse. Then he just leaned back and enjoyed all. Little Red's giggles brought a huge smile on his lips. I was gratified to see that. Miss Smiles melted his heart with her smile and thrown kisses. May my girls and their husbands be blessed for their efforts to bring joy to the hero. God has been good to us.

Feeling Our Way

When we came home, no one thought the Hero would make it out of the hospice. Now that we are at home the nurses are constantly second guessing the Lord as to when the Hero's time has come. He is weak and the morphine really hurts him mentally...ie: depression. Our biggest problem has been the urine catheter. Most of the time we spend reading or watching up lifting videos. The Hero can not stand violence or hateful things, not even in the form of humor ie: "Home Alone". He loves hymns and prayer.

The last two days have been cold for here. We have to use electric heaters because of his oxygen. He did like it when I opened the door for him to see snow in Montgomery TX. Not a usual happening. Of course the snow was not like the picture, but the flakes were huge like the snowflakes up north. We were amused by the phone calls from our son and daughters. It is funny for years one can long for snow, then after living in it for a short time, the enjoyment dwindles with the knowledge of what comes with snow.

The other morning I had been really tired from up and down all night. My oldest son called just to say "Hi, how are you?" It was an encouragement I needed. The hardest thing about cancer is the pain that takes away the ability of loved ones to hold or cuddle the person hurting. Since I am a huggy type person, you have to understand that my inner self is in great pain. It is not my desire to complain, it is merely my desire to express my pain to let some of it go. I know that one day, we will greet each other with wonderful hugs and kisses on the other side. I just miss them so very much with him right next to me. We exchange kisses and smiles as our manner of loving one another.

Right now, the hope is that he will make it through the Christmas holidays, in order that the children can make it to see him and spend some time with him. I just don't know what the Lord has in mind. I do what I can. Don't mistake this post as one of discouragement, rather one of bewilderment. Between the nurses and the fatigue, it is hard to keep in tune with the spirit and understand what is happening.

We Are Decking the Hall with Holly

Thanksgiving was a wonderful blessing.

Surrounded by my children that could make it home and their children. My sweet Hero was alternately grateful for all the attention and overwhelmed.

He loved the fun of watching them play board games and watching the leaves falling from the large window in the living room where his bed is situated.

We had a traditional meal with the dressing being my one disaster this year. The turkey was so fat that the dressing was just swimming in the fat. We disposed of it and enjoyed my son-in-law's favorite mashed potatoes with the meal. Now it is the day after and we have all leaned back and just tried to

relax for the early part of the day until most have dispersed. My number 4 child

is still here and setting up Christmas decorations for us. She is a blessing too.

Christmas promises to be a special time for us. So far, Heavenly Father has been blessing my Hero with his strength increasing daily. Does this say the cancer is gone? No, but he is busy searching for things to do that are uplifting and good for others. I so love him. He is uplifting to me, even when he is sitting and thinking for the next thing for me to do. LOL

We are having to work on what we thought might be bed sores beginning. I am beginning to think that maybe it is the same stuff as the gangrene he had on his groin. All that nasty stuff inside must have a way of getting out...if skin is the closest area...that is what it will be. Enough negative. We are excited about the upcoming holiday. God is in His heaven and He loves us all so much that he gave his only begotten Son.

Through Christ's atonement, we are afforded the ability to overcome.

I love Christmas so I will be enjoying posting this month to use my free clip art.

Some Things are Priceless

The Hero made the following comment as he hung up his phone from talking with a treasured old friend. With tears in his eyes he said, "I can never be poor, when I have the wealth of such friends."

This is such a truth.

We are excited! We are going home! It is still under the supervision of hospice, but it will be just 2 or 3 visits a week. The rest of the time he can enjoy home. Blessings do hold our hopes up.

Tonight the Hero is exhausted. An old friend from college came by, a cousin, and three friends from church. The visits were wonderful and he laughed and joked and reminiscing of times past. Now that the excitement has diminished, he is resting quietly on his pillow.

I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father that is mindful of his lowly servants needs. What joy to know, we will be in the gentle surroundings of our own home. Praise be to His name.

Love to all

More Things I Have Learned

This is a sunset. Sometimes during the storm, it looks so dark then the clouds start dispersing and you see a glorious sunset and know that there is still great beauty around.

That is how I feel today. We are at the hospice. Lovely people, but all still have the same mindset that the doctors at the hospital did. It is over just keep him sedated and he will just be fine. WELL, my hero just needed a break. Yesterday the family that was closest all came by and visited with him. By the end of the day, he was more alert, but still very weak. They finally started moving his pain medication back to where it was before we went into the hospital. I had been worrying about having a new doctor to start all over with. (The hospice doctor takes over the care and all other doctors disappear.) God steps in and wa la...the doctor comes in (and while he is not the only doctor, he is one of them that will see the Hero) and surprise of surprises, he was the doctor that inserted the chest tube in the Hero's pleura space to drain the fluid off his lungs at the hospital. He, after visiting with the Hero, increased the pain long acting medication back to what it was before hospitalization.

That relaxed the hero so much that he fell asleep after being given the medication and slept from 9pm to 3 am. Now when you are in the room and want to sleep until 6am...not so cool...but when you are awaken by a wide awake time oriented and alert spouse that you have not been able to have a sane conversation with for 8 days...the sleep dissipates and you sit up and take notice. This is were we had a strong discussion with the night nurse. Her thought was just sedate him and it doesn't matter that he won't be able to think. I said 'no'...he wants to be able to make choices. The Hero after listening to the exchange, then told the nurse he needed pain relief, but did not want to be sedated. So she went to the doctor at 4am and asked for his pain medication to be completely put back to his home meds. Woo hoo...he now has a mind...they were giving him an anti-psychotic, and sleep medication. It pays to ask questions about what are you giving "me".

As I was contemplating all that has happened, it came to me that going through these times have given us lessons in enduring to the end. Christ says "endure to the end that you may have eternal life." I thought "hmmm, if we just sedate ourselves with "whatever", then we miss the opportunity to learn how to endure." I have learned that endurance is done with a clear mind and accepting heart.

Our children and the Hero too have frequently wondered why the blessings of healing when he goes through so much. It has sometimes had an appearance of Job. The Hero, even when his mind was clouded, found solace in trying to say a prayer. He remembered that prayers of gratitude to the Lord were important. Sometimes the prayers were a simple "Heavenly Father, please help me". I have learned that comfort permeates the person who has a prayer in their heart. There is great peace in him. Unless of course I leave and he didn't really realize that I had left, then it can be a challenge.

I must stop and pay attention to my hero. May the Lord be with me and thee. Hummer

Preparations Must be Made

Just letting everyone know what the oncologist said today. He said that the cancer is so extensive and the Hero is so weak that chemo and radiation is not an option. He was interested in Dad's hopes and said that keeping his hope alive was important. However, the decision to not do extra measures (such as CPR) if he had heart failure etc. was made. That is what the Hero wants, he never wanted to be on a machine. At this point, Dr. Patel ( The Hero has faith and trust in him and had asked him to continue on the case if he could.), has the goal to get him home. It may be via inhouse hospice...and kind of medical halfway house...then home on hospice. The Hero was asking yesterday to go home. It has been determined that since he has a damaged liver, that the medication is not being metabolized as it should and that is why he is so sedated. So hmmm... hope is that we can discontinue the Haldol a strong antipsycotic drug that was given to aid him in the confusion experienced after ICU. Prayers are in order. All is in Heavenly Father's hands, I am at peace with whatever He has in mind. I will do all I can and strive to keep The Hero's hope alive until he is called home to Heavenly Father. I am writing, because I love all of you and my sinuses can't handle the tears I experience talking about this. The Hero is my special friend, we have had a wonderful life of 38 years together, 7 marvelous children and 13 awesome grandchildren. The years have been filled with fun, challenges, laughter, and love.
I don't like facing this...but I can do it and Heavenly Father is with me always.

Gratitude

Fall, especially November, is a time for expressing our gratitude to Heavenly Father for the bounteous blessings that he has given us through out the year. For our fore- fathers, it was for the crops and actually living for another year. It is not so with us, there are too many things that distract us from properly expressing that gratitude. Many have big family dinners, then mom or grandmother fall exhaustively into a chair afterwards. Others consider it a great day to shop or go play on the lake etc. Considering the size of our countries population, only a few take the time to reflect and meditate on the blessing they have received. ....Off my soap box.

I want everyone who reads this to know, I know that there is a loving Heavenly Father who listens to and answers our prayers. I know that He is mindful of our every need. Sometimes, it is hard to distinguish between wants and needs. I am thankful for a righteous man who has been a good steward over his church duties, family duties, and as a husband. I am very grateful to my Heavenly Father who has blessed me with special time and love with my hero.

Today, we have been told that there is excessive fluid in the hero's left lung. They will draw off the fluid tomorrow. And that should allow the lung to re inflate. I am grateful for the blessing that the fluid can be drawn off. I pray for the hero's safety and the arms of Christ to encircle him in his time of need.

I would also like to express my love and gratitude for all of those that have prayed for the hero and put his name on prayer rolls and have extended helping arms and hands. I love all of you. It is uplifting to know angels are here with me. God bless you all.

The Hummer

Infections Reveal Themselves

Like a rainbow revealing a pot of gold, the hero's temperature has revealed two infections going on.

The urine test came back that he had a bladder infection. That is not unusual for someone with an indwelling catheter. (They have not learned as I have to listen to the hero because he lives close to the spirit and many times has told me things which were true but not things I wanted to accept because I did not see the evidence...which later presented itself.)The bladder infection still did not answer for me why the hero was experiencing shortness of breath. Today one of the several disciples of doctors ordered a x-ray done. We waited to find out the results.

At 3 pm they decided to change his morphine to Fentayl. A very strong opioid. First he was given Lyrica. A new potentiating anti-inflamatory drug for the Fentayl. Then they started the Fentayl. Everything seemed to be going fine until about 8pm, when they were doing his wound care. (Which, by-the-way has closed and he has beautiful new skin. An indication that his immune system must be working.) All of a sudden he was unable to get his air, not just shortness of breath, rather difficultly breathing and his oxygen level fell below normal level and the O2 did not relieve it, and he became very distressed. His blood pressure went up to 190/92. They began asking if he was on blood pressure medication. NOT!. I looked up Fentayl. Important side effect...difficulty breathing.... The nurse waited 30 min rechecked his blood pressure. Still high. So she called the doctor on call. The hero has told her he does not want to continue with the Fentayl. The doctor came in and said well it could be the pneumonia that was causing the shortness of breath. The hero and I were surprised. We said, "where did the pneumonia come from?" She said the doctors apparently had not seen the x-ray result and that the radiologist has summarized the report in that it appeared that he had pneumonia behind the cancer growth in the lung. The hero said that was all well and good but the onset of the breathing was so sudden that it was not likely to be from pneumonia as that would have been building slow growing shortness of breath. He felt it was the medication. She said okay that she was going to order the morphine restarted stop the other and proceed to treat him for pneumonia. He now has an O2 mask on; they have started breathing treatments. He has calmed down, but he has dark circles under his eyes and is tired. They have also started 2 new antibiotics. I sit here working on the blog keeping and eye on him. God is good. I am so thankful for such a wonderful hero and it wrenches my heart to see him suffer. He was musing that he had gone through the gangrene and yet the Lord had spared him...for what to go through this excruciating pain? I reminded him that he still has a work to do.

He is working hard to overcome. Prayers are our support under our dragging arms.

Will update as things break through. : )

Confusion

This is my own paintart picture I entitled "Confusion"

Well,
Monday was an up and down day. The hero was first told, that they were changing his pain medication to hydromorphone....Dalaudid. We were not familiar with the name hydromorphone, so we didn't realize it was dalaudid until the nurse came in to change the drip. Even under the influence of the heavy morphine, a flag went up and he wouldn't let them give it to him until I got back from moving the car. ( I stupidly had put his phone in my purse...duh) The Spirit works! Dalaudid makes him totaly zoned out to where he gets depressed and can't even remember what day it is etc.
Next the nurse relayed that they were going to do a pelvic bloc at 1 pm. We had been told they would come by and discuss it with us. 30 min later they came back and said no we will do it tomorrow. 2 hours later the internal systems doctor came by and said..."They will not do the nerve bloc because the cancer is too near to the area they need to work in." That was a blow to the hero because he had not been told that there would be a time limit on obtaining the bloc. 30min after that, the Hero had a 101 fever. Now they have done all sorts of cultures. We thought that may be it was the constipation from the high doses of morphine. A doctor at UTMB had figured that out last Jan when they couldn't find a reason for his 102 temps. Whatever, he has felt like there was an infection going on so maybe...it could be your prayers for his welfare. The surgeons said they would not do surgery on him. The Internal Medicine team said they were just interested in his chronic pain control. If anyone will do anything, it will have to be the oncologist. That would be the doctor that he had at intake. They upped his dose of morphine again, so he is not really alert and drifts off. He can wake up to eat. etc. Tomorrow will be another day.
Stay tuned to the latest saga in the life of "The Hero"
Love ya all
MOMe

Happy Birthdays

How could I have forgotten!!!!

My son in law just had his birthday on Wednesday. We will have cake this weekend when they come up. (can't find a picture will do later)

My second daughter had her birthday today. She will not have cake as she is fighting a systemic yeast infection...so her sweet husband said..."where shall we go shopping."

If my reminders are not working....I do forget where I am as well as what is going on.

Love them all!!!!!

The Journey to MD Anderson clinics

The journey to get to the clinic was like a hike to a cabin in the woods.

We maneuvered our way through the maize of the traffic and turns from downtown Houston to Holcombe Blvd next to M D Anderson Hospital. There, they told us to use the valet parking. We parked....went in, there they routed us to the skywalk (remember the hero can barely stand for long now let alone walk long distances.). That was up two floors. At the skywalk, they did have a golf cart (club cart) that the hero was able to lean on to ride over to the Mozy Bldg. I walked, as there wasn't anymore room, to take his walker over. WALKED...the equivalent of 4 blocks!. The building was 4 blocks away! I found out we could have parked next to the building. Ask me if my sore ankle was tired. We arrived with the blessing of an MD Anderson employee who pushed the hero up in a wheelchair from the skywalk to elevators U to go to the 8th floor to his appointed clinic (remember I still had to push his walker). Surprisingly, we made it and we were only 5 min. late. I really was surprised. We filled out his papers. This was at 11:15am. Then proceeded to picnic...I had brought his lunch...he ate well...no nausea this time. We found a puzzle they had on a coffee table and settled the hero down on the couch and I focused on figuring out the puzzle. Finally at 2:00 pm, the hero said, "can you see what is happening". So much for thinking they would be on top of things. I went to the desk, and asked. She looked surprised...and said who is the patient? I told her...she was like "oh darn...we goofed" all over her face. She said let me talk with the in taker. We were in in 10 minutes. From that time on, it went well. He was given a patient number. I have to send back more papers, like proof of citizenship, residency in the US etc... The doctor was a full doctor not a resident with faculty. He was very astute, asked questions, took notes, paid attention, and really very nice. I have a habit of calling these young doctors "the little doctor" even if they are 6 ft tall. He caught the references and laughed and said he knows what he will be called now.

The plan at present is to reevaluate what all has happened since the last treatments. That means new labs, c-scan, obtaining records, etc., once those are in hand, then he will decide which direction to go. It will take a little while, but that will let the hero's wound to finish healing. We are 3/4ths there now. Some chemotherapy treatments are not an option any longer since he developed gangrene before. No matter, the hero is encouraged that someone is listening to his needs, and that is probably worth more than treatments right now. He had lost down to 155lbs. (a 10lb drop) since the gangrene infection.

The picture I used is from classroom clip art. I have hiked to cabins up in the mountains just like that, when I was younger, of course. Love the feeling of hmmmm not aloneness, but calmness, and peacefulness that comes from separation from crowds.

The next step in our journey has begun. Pray for us. We pray for all.

Unexpected Blessings

The sun always comes out after the storms.

This last week has been a long hard one. After hurricane Ike, we discovered that we were monetarily short. I looked at the pantry and said well, we will just have to live on food storage for a week or two. Faces from the peanut gallery. Not to take away blessings from some wonderful people (so I won't mention their names), I want to say we were blessed by a sister from the ward who came over to "get a hug" and bring by a pot roast and cookies. We did recognize the blessing. The pot roast fed us for at least 4 meals and some of the meat served to furnish barbecue meat for my son's lunches. We just ate the last of the potatoes with our lunch after church today. Another sister came by with meat and soup left over from her job which is at a catering company, and another sister brought by deer sausage...none knew of the situation of these next few weeks so it was really testimony building of how our Heavenly Father watches over us in our need. We are taken care of until this minor financial challenge is over.

The hero has been overwhelmed with the kindness of others. He has been having huge amounts of pain and our biggest challenge right now is keeping nourishment in his body. He has lost more weight. We will be going to MD Anderson Cancer Hospital for evaluation since John Sealy UTMB is still closed. That will be on Wednesday. I will update after that.

I had told you I would write about my son's motorcycle...have to take pictures...He is not cooperating.

clip art is from a teachers clip art web site...

Get Above the Circumstances

[Having wonderful smelling herbs around are so uplifting.
I love rosemary. I have it just outside the door. It is nice to run your fingers through the limbs and what a lively fragrance. Pineapple sage is both sweet and pungent. The flowers attract the hummingbirds. Oh, I forgot to tell you we put up our feeder and had hours of fun watching the many hummers work together and fight for the the nectar. The hero said they are hard workers but can be mean too! ; ) ]
Here it is Oct. 16, 2008 almost a month since my last post. As I was glancing over the previous post, I believe I neglected to let you know that at the end of July, the radiation oncologist looked at the hero's ct scan again and discovered that the results had been read backward. That instead of going backwards he had been improving in every area. Sigh. The truth is we have been trying to get back to treatment since then. The radiation Dr immediately contacted oncology (chemotherapy) and told them to get him back in the program. Well, 4 weeks later an appointment was made...the hero was in the hospital, so ... they reappointed him to come in on Sep. 13th. Hurricane Ike was a factor and all appointments were canceled. Here it is a month later and we are now trying to find the serving clinic since Galveston hospital of UTMB John Sealy is still trying to dry out and mold clean up and remodel after the water damage done.


We keep getting teaser calls saying that things are being worked on then silence for a week until we call again, only to find that things are still in confusion.


I have suffered from stress which created an acid condition in my body that caused joint pain and muscle spasms. Our daughter and her wonderful husband have blessed us since my walking and the hero's right now are compromised. They are wonderful. With the loving care of a great friend that knows herbs my condition has begun to reverse itself. The arms are almost a okay and the knees are now walkable.


The gangrene wound is healing very well. I am excited at that progress. But he has been having extreme pain in his buttocks, so that is worrisome. One doctor suggested some of the problem might be over congestion of the lymph nodes trying to clean out the dead gunk. Most likely...so I have turned to alternative medicine once again to try to open and move the lymph system and help the liver which will be overloaded. So much...you would think that some of this would be addressed by the medical system unstead of just more medicine to help pain. I am venting sorry.


Our goal has been to focus on smiling and being uplifting to others. Usually we succeed, but sometimes the hero has his head down under the circumstances and we have to pull it up so he can see the angels around him. God has blessed us greatly. It is nice to know we are able to make decisions for ourselves and that there are helping hands at every turn.


I will post next about my youngest son and our experience in his getting his motorcycle license.


Life is good.

Tisk, Tisk and Shame on me!

I never wrote in June about the hero and his venture of creating Fig Jam.

One evening he came in and exclaimed "the fig trees (we have three) are just loaded with figs!" He then commenced to have me plan out what he need to make fig jam, enough for us and the kids. I was still dealing with an ankle that kept me off my feet, so...we would come home from work, he would snatch up a small grocery bag and off he would go to the trees. About and hour later, he would come in with the bags brimming, and grinning from ear to ear. He was excited. It was fun cleaning the figs for him which I could do and squishing them, then showing him the amounts of other ingredients he needed. He would do one or two batches a night. [He lost about 2 bags of figs he had frozen to the hurricane.] Below he is stirring his brew over the stove and below that is his finished product. He canned about 36 jars of fig preserves. Most were strawberry flavored but he experimented with other jello flavors too. We will have to wait for the kids to tell you if they are good or not, I am prejudiced...they were wonderful and I so loved watching him work. What a wonderful feeling of accomplishment and being provident.

Oh MY, Hurricane Ike went through like a Hurricane ; )

We had gone to the surgical clinic on Wednesday before Ike. Because of the storm brewing, we were sent home with some catheter kits and orders to change the dressings to normal saline and do it twice a day. The orders were if he still can't void on his own, when your kits are used up, go the emergency room.
We stayed home to sit out the hurricane. We are 125 miles inland from Galveston and were on the west side of the storm. Our son and daughter and her husband battened down the hatches and we all worked together to make it being locked up in the house for the deluge. Watching the long oak limbs swing widely left one wondering if they would stay attached to the trees. There were some 75 - 100 mph gusts but no sustained winds of that caliber...thank goodness! The neighbors lost a tree across the road, and the same on the way into town. The day after the storm, my son drove in and assisted others in cleaning up the roads and investigated the damage in town. It became evident that we fared well in just loosing a greenhouse and some misc. limbs and electricity ( which meant the well wouldn't work). [I will add pictures when we finally get home. I left the camera there.] We waited 4 days and then gave up to go on into the hero's twin brother to stay, so the hero could have water and bathe. They were lovely host and hostess. What blessings they have earned, in all the service they offered my hero and myself.
After I ran out of catheter kits, we ended up in the ER at a hospital near his brother's home. They have been lovely personnel in this hospital. I hope we can pay some. They put him on antibiotics again, catheterized him, and restarted his wound care like we do at home. The only problem is the confusion around his pain medication routine. Confuses me why it is so hard for them to grasp continuity.

Things They Don't Prepare You For.

Since I updated last, we have had so much happen. My hero was beginning to have great pain in his groin area and fevers. We went on a trip to have a scan done to tell us the locations of the cancer and if it was still active. When we got there, we discovered the cancer part of the scan had been banned by the FDA saying they were pinpointing the cancer cells too soon? Anyway, the gist of his modified scan said that there were toxins in his body that needed to be expelled. We thought well after the chemo that was probably true. The day after we got back, I worked and the hero stayed home and slept. On Sunday, I went to church because he could not wakup to get ready to go. His temperature was 100. When I got back home, I checked him again and it was 102. Our home teacher came by to administer sacrament to him and found him not in his right mind. He was confused. I gave him Tylenol and the temp came down to 99. He decided not to go to the ER, but to go to work instead. It took him until 11 am to his bookkeeper in some challenges she had. That night he told me that his buttocks were hurting. This was not a new declaration( I thought)...Paradigms can get one into trouble. On Tuesday, we went back to work. He became very feverish. I gave his Tylenol and the fever went down to 99.9. We were trying to decide if it was from the trip. This evening he said "look at my buttocks and tell me if they are swollen"...I did and yes the right buttock was twice the size of the other, red and feverish. I said we will go to the ER in the morning. When he got up, the swelling had moved all over his lower parts and was fire engine red. We headed straight to the ER. When we arrived, his temperature was 103.6. They ushered him right in. One look at the area and the seasoned ER surgeon said major infection probably that came from cancer tissue dying and building into an abscess. Two hours later he was in surgery. I waited for the simple procedure to end... only to see that in 40 min he was in recovery...I waited for a doctor...none came...looked up again to see ICU...this was not the plan the doctor had described in the ER. I met the nurses transferring him at the door. They were upset that I had not talked to a doctor yet. He was experiencing high blood pressure and tachycardia so they planned to keep him in surgical ICU over night to make sure he stayed stable. I went home with Emily and spent the night there, after visiting with a very woozy hero. The next day he was moved to a surgical recovery floor. ( The nurses and aides have been really wonderful and sweet people.) Friday morning, the surgeons decided that more debrieding of necrotic tissue was needed. Saturday for the first time I got to see the length and width and depth of the wound was...Oh geez, that was painful just to look at. My heart goes out to him as he endures the dressing changes. We have now been in here over a week, and today, Saturday, they told him they are sending him home on Sunday....Oh my I have to do the dressing changes, watching the indwelling catheter, meds, and oh my. It helps being a nurse, but looking into that wound is scary. Today will be transition to going home. Our son and daughter and their families are coming up today...will have to send them home with some money to assist in preparing the room for a sterile set up.
Sigh...Prayers are my source of comfort in this.